This past Tuesday I did something that I had never done before.  About 3 months ago, my pastor's wife, Harriet asked if I would be a part of the upcoming Esther series in our Women's Sisterhood group at church.  She felt like the Lord had given her my name, along with 4 other women to teach about the book of Esther.  Now let me tell ya, I didn't question my pastor's wife because I know she hears from the Lord, but I did however strongly question the Lord.

I wanted to know why in the world would he place me in line with such strong, spiritual women that I consider my own mentors, to teach in front of 100 other women.  I mean, He knows that speaking in front of people terrifies me, plus what in the world would I even talk about?!  But after weeks of silence and no answer, I finally changed my question to "what."  What Lord, do you want me to tell these women?  Pretty soon I realized that the very thing that He wanted me to teach was the very thing that I was learning myself.

My Voice.

Little did I know that not only would He empower others through this teaching of Esther and the use of our God given Voice, but He would also teach me more about what He has created me to do.  Although my hands were sweaty and my nerves were beyond a mess, once I finished I found such a release of fulfillment because I had stepped out in obedience for Him.

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But here is the best thing...

I was so focused on me speaking at Sisterhood this past Tuesday, that I had little to no time to even think about the specialist appointment for baby Porter the very next day.  We woke up early Wednesday morning, dropped the other girls off with a friend and went to the Fetal Specialist to have an ultrasound.  We had already been told that our chances for Down Syndrome or other defects were pretty high considering the amount of fluid that was found on the back of the baby's neck.  And honestly, even though we were praying daily against the "what-if's," Wade and I had both come to a place where we knew that God would bring us through whatever comes our way.  We had already decided that whatever the diagnosis that we would research what we could to better prepare ourselves to be the best parents that we could be.  No matter what.

So we sat down in the waiting room with peace.  Not knowing what was ahead, but not concerned with it anyways.  That's real trust.

Before the specialist appointment, we had TWO previous ultrasounds given by two different techs and analyzed by two different doctors from two different practices.  Both of these concluded the same results... that there was over 3.5mm of fluid on the back of the baby's neck.  Which was well beyond "normal."

If you look closely at the picture below, you can see the "black" in between the spine and the body of the baby.  This was 1 week ago...

And here is the ultrasound from this past Wednesday (just one week after the above picture.)

Baby Porter is healthy, whole and perfectly made.  The fluid was less than 1.3mm which is completely normal.  The doctors even asked what we were there for...  They just couldn't understand that the fluid had decreased that much in less than a week.

But we could.

I cannot put into words the emotion of pure happiness that we both felt at the moment of such good news.  I just cried and said thank you Jesus right there lying on the table, belly all exposed.  Again, He had given us a miracle.  Once again.  We are so underserving, but yet He loves us all so much.

I find it interesting that this day of bliss came the day after I stepped out in obedience and did something for the Lord that I was terrified to do.

I love the Lord's timing.

There is nothing greater.  Step out into obedience and DO what He is calling you to do.  Even if you have to do it afraid.  Watch God move in your life all because He loves you and He loves when you surrender yourself to Him in full obedience.

If you said a prayer for baby Porter... then your words moved mountains that day.

Thank YOU.  And it's all HIS glory.

I was planning on announcing my good news with a fancy picture and a new blog post.  But then the unexpected happened so here goes my news...

About 8 weeks ago I had a dream.  Wade and I were holding a baby boy in the hospital.  All of the staff from LifeCC were there in the room and one of them was even talking about the amazing eye lashes on this little bundle.  The baby's name was Porter.  He was beautiful.

I woke up that morning and told Wade that it was probably the most real dream that I have ever had.  Later that day, I decided to take a few minutes and look up the meaning of Porter.  It means "gatekeeper."
The job of the gatekeeper in the Bible was to keep the sheep in line with the shepherd.
To keep believers in line with the Lord.

Instantly, I knew that this name had some weight and carried a lot of meaning.  And we actually liked it too.
But I wasn't pregnant.  Nor did we want to be for at least another year.  I mean we have some pretty big plans ahead of us.  We needed to get "prepared" before adding on number four.  BUT, this dream... well it caused the curiosity to take over so I decided to take a test for fun.  Positive.  Porter was already in the making.
I was unexpectedly expecting.

We announced it to our closest friends and family and were going to wait and do a big gender announcement for the rest of the world.  Aka Facebook.

But these plans changed.

Last Monday, I received a phone call.  A call that no mother-to-be ever wants to hear.  She simply informed me of their discoveries and that I needed to see my doctor as soon as possible.  The doctors had found some fluid on the back of the baby's neck that was abnormal.

A few calls later and a good chat with my mid-wife, I found out what we were dealing with and the next steps that needed to take place.  And a good cry.  A very long, out pour of a cry.

You see, this very moment brought back such stand-still moments from the past into my mind and body.
I remember the call that I received with Lela that there was a mass on her brain.  I remember where I was standing, what I was wearing and what I felt when the words left the doctors lips.  I also remember the day that God healed her.  I had never seen, nor felt the mighty Hand of God like I did that day.  HE reached into my womb and the mass disappeared.  Even the doctors were confused.

So when the flood of tears came this time, I chose to remember that day just 4 and half years ago.  That day of healing.  This held me far above my fears.  This truth of what God could do, what He WILL do gave me peace that surpassed all understanding.

So instead of giving life to the words of what this could be, I am asking that you give life to what it should be... and that is total healing and health.  I am asking that you pray for Baby Porter and that you pray for me.  That I will be strong, no matter what lies ahead simply because I know that my Father leads the way.  

SO WITHOUT FURTHER ADO...
I would like to announce Baby Porter who will be here sometime around October 26th.
Healthy, Whole and Full of God's Purpose.

This past weekend, Wade Nagy and I celebrated our 6 year old.  The words still blow my mind.  A six year old.  There was a day in my early motherhood where I thought I would never make it past the 3 month, no sleeping, constantly wearing spit-up stage with any amount of success.  And now I have a 6 year old, who is bright, funny and incredibly loyal to those that she cares about.  Which is pretty much everyone.  I have never met a 6 year old that cares about Jesus and the homeless man that stands out in front of Target all with the same amount of passion and love.  She loves whole-heartedly and she is full of words.  Given that this child rarely spoke until she was 3 and underwent some major speech therapy... she has by far made up for the loss.  She is a motor mouth and this weekend was no exception.



HAPPY 6TH BIRTHDAY EMMA JANE!
We love you.

This weekend Life Community Church, our church that we love, celebrated their 10th year birthday.  It was an amazing celebration for us and considering that we have only been a part of this family for the past 3 years, I can't even begin to imagine the emotion that was felt by our Pastors, Tim and Harriet.

Saturday was a day of celebration where over 500 of our church family and friends gathered to run. play, hunt for easter eggs and eat.  It was by far one of the most fun celebrations that I have been a part of.  I could describe the event down to the very last easter egg color, but it wouldn't describe the joy that was found on that soccer field.  That's because it wasn't found in all of the fun activities and hip music being played... it was found in the family that all came together to celebrate one purpose. Life Community Church has impacted one city and many more for 10 years... all from the vision that God had placed in the hearts and minds of two believers, who decided then and there, that they would answer God's calling for their lives.  And standing on that field, seeing all of those people, was like standing on the mountain and seeing two people's vision being fulfilled all because they were willing to answer Him.

Last night after we came home and put our exhausted girls to sleep, just before my head hit my own pillow, I found myself reflecting on the last 10 years of my life.  Ten years ago, I had been dating my true love for almost a year.  I was in the middle of my student teaching semester in college and was about to graduate from ASU.  I was living with my parents at the time and commuting as much as possible to Cornelius to see Mr. Wade Nagy, the man I wanted to marry.  I remember praying for a job that would bring me closer to him.

Throughout this 10 year span, I went through about 8 different jobs trying to figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up, but finally landed back at teaching first grade.  I married the man who supported every crazy decision, even the one where I thought  I wanted to be an airplane attendant, as he watched me fly myself to D.C to attend a training, all to realize that it wasn't for me.  Upon getting married, we had our first born just a year and half later and it wasn't long after that we stumbled upon Jesus again.  This was a marker in our life.  We had no idea until this point what we had been missing.  We have always loved Jesus.  But this is where we began to KNOW Him.  And it was beautiful.  Our life took a turn in ways that we had never dreamed and with each new spiritual growth, we encountered tremendous push-back.  Job-losses, dreams shattered, finances in shambles and health issues arose... but we were stronger because of Him.  We had our second born, moved to our dream city of Wilmington and brought home our third baby girl one year later.  It may not seem like much when written down, but it was quite the journey.

Today, at church we celebrated again.  And this time, involved Gluten Free Cupcakes. :) :) After church, Wade, the girls and I went to lunch.  We decided to reflect on where we wanted to be in 10 years.  This topic was completely interrupted with "where's my fork, cut my pizza and momma I gotta potty..." but we did have a few good minutes to talk.  For starters... I will be 42 and the ages of my children will range from 16 to 13.  Freaky!! And with that said, we also realized that there WILL be a day when Wade and I can actually finish a conversation.  Which made this crazy, chaotic moment seem more enjoyable and ever so fleeting.

But as for the things we don't know, the things that only God can see but things that He too shapes from the desires of our heart...  Those are the things that I want to stand on the field one day and look back and celebrate our vision, His vision and how it came to pass.

Wade and I listed several things that we want to happen in the next 10 years.  Those things will change and some will grow into other, bigger, better ideas, but it was exciting and eye opening to list those dreams out.  And for this season to be a season of where our visions actually involve our children.  They too will be standing on the field with us reflecting on what God has done.  We truly believe that the last 10 years of our life has been a training ground for us and that moving forward into the next 10 years, it will be a time to really be used by and for His Kingdom.  That all of those moments of trial, we will soon see such fruit and blessings come from it and that in turn will win others to Jesus Christ.

So as our church has said all weekend long...

THE BEST IS YET TO COME.

What do you want to make of your next 10 years?